Find Peace in Parenting
It was two weeks before Christmas when my son decided to walk out of our front door with no intention of returning. I knew I had every reason in the world to be hurt, angry, disappointed, shocked, sad, and frustrated ~ and I was. I even felt gypped. And, I’m not going to lie, I spent a lot of time feeling all of these emotions until I realized how exhausted I was, even how bitter I was becoming, and how out of control I felt.
Yuck! Yuck! Yuck!
Even though the situation was out of my control, I realized I had also handed control of my own well-being over to someone who I believed wasn’t making very good choices. That was when I knew there had to be a better way for me to show up in this situation.
Yes, this whole situation wasn’t fair, but being enraged with my son only made me feel angry and feeling resentment only made me bitter. So I decided to figure out how I wanted to feel, what kind of mom I wanted to be, even in this awful situation.
I decided I wanted to feel love.
Since I know thoughts and feelings are connected, I knew I’d have to stop telling myself he was a selfish brat. Whether or not it was true (and I certainly had a lot of evidence that it was), thinking about him this way only made me frustrated. And I wanted to feel love. So I decided to think this instead: This is his journey and I can love him and pray for him.
What a difference that thought was for me! It did help me feel love and compassion, which allowed me to (mostly) behave in a way I wouldn’t have to cringe about later.
How do you want to feel about your own son? What would you have to believe to feel that way?
Figuring this out for yourself will immediately change your relationship with your son even if nothing about him or the situation changes. I’m living proof it is true.
If you’re ready to take your control back but aren’t quite sure how to really take that first step, I’m here to help you. Simply sign up for a free mini-session and I’ll show you how you can start to make it happen in your own situation.